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Smoking Nightmare, Crave, Pain, and Hungry!!

 
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marw



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Posts: 3634
Location: Chicago, IL

PostPosted: March 12, 2005 1:40 AM    Post subject: Smoking Nightmare, Crave, Pain, and Hungry!! Reply with quote

HI All,

Need to Rant, and don't even know exactly how. Had the Stress Test today.
I decided to take a brief nap after and then go to the gym, but I had such terrible nightmare about smoking that I am not fit to do anything. Also, my back started hurting fiercely from that exercise for the Stress Test today, which didn't hurt at the time but is now hurting really badly.

I need to post more here, but I hate to do it. I feel like an idiot if I just go on and on about my health troubles all the time. But I really need to post that smoking nightmare, so maybe I will. I'm beginning to hate Lunaversaries, because it seems like I always have craves then. And I never know where to put this: Rants or Staying Quit.

I just feel really down. Hopeless. But I know it is all because of that nightmare. How can our subconscious betray us this way? Also, I should have stopped that Stress Test. It was not worth screwing up my back like this. The apparatus that you wear for the breathing is like scuba gear, and to help support the weight of it, you wear a thing like an open helment on your head that weighs it down--pushes your neck down into your shoulders and the mouthpiece pulls your neck too much forward. I told them this, but this is how it is done. Then, the test included a 14 per cent slant plus running on the slant (while wearing the above). I stopped the test long before I was really tired because I just had a feeling that I should. Now I know why. Still, the whole thing is my fault--they would have stopped anytime. But no, I pulled in all my stoic pain control techniques (maybe all this trance work and Biofeedback is not such a great thing?) and played Wonder Woman! Bah! Now I get to pay for it.

Well, thanks for listening, and sorry to dump all this out. I tried to tell a 3-d friend, but she just didn't want to hear it. I guess I am a real drag always telling people health problems, but I don't know how else to handle it. I have to talk to someone.

I will go for now. Maybe I will go post at least the dream. Maybe it would help. Trust the Laughing Demon to stick his nose into every little stiuation, which pisses me off. But I have a rule to post early, and so I will.

And how can I stop being so hungry! Sad I am so hungry all the time! I may have to stop eating all these veggies and fruit, if I am so hungry. I feel like I don't get enough to eat no matter how much of that stuff I eat.

I think I might be a tad stressed! Wink Rolling Eyes
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Margaret
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ms_tapestry



Quit Date:
October 21, 2009

Posts: 2574
Location: Seminole, TX

PostPosted: March 12, 2005 6:35 AM    Post subject: Reply with quote

Good morning Margaret. I'm sorry you are having a rough time of it right now. Medical tests are always stressful for me. I truly detest them but know they are necessary so I muddle through the best I can. On the eating part, you might try adding some protein to the fruit and veggies. A boiled egg, one or two ounces of low fat cheese, or even a tablespoon of fresh peanut butter slows down the absorbtion of those carbs and keeps you from getting hungry as quickly. Calming thoughts are coming your way. btw: Happy lunaversary Ms. Margaret. One more month until the Big Table! Cool
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You must do the very thing you think you cannot do.
~ Eleanor Roosevelt
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alleghany



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PostPosted: March 12, 2005 6:50 AM    Post subject: Reply with quote

Margaret~

By the time you read this, I know you will be feeling better. Sometimes we need a little shake-up to get our lives really in order. Maybe you could do something out of the ordinary today to help refocus.

You are doing great! Cool
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marw



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Location: Chicago, IL

PostPosted: March 12, 2005 4:49 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

Yes, I am feeling better. ANd thanks for answering!! Very Happy I guess I just needed to blather a bit. Sometimes I'm like that, and it always helps! Very Happy

The dream is past--whew!--the back is some better--and I had already figured out that I need to add protein to my diet, but it helps to hear it. THe thing is that I am JUST A CARNIVORE! Rolling Eyes Gonna keep the veggies and fruit, but I gotta have that meat--more of it. Last night after I posted all these "safeguard" messages for my quit, I then went in the kitchen and ate half the pork roast and a sack of gummi worms, and I felt a whole HEAP better! Laughing Well, whatever works, I guess.

Thanks, guys, for listening! Very Happy
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Margaret
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kevin
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PostPosted: March 12, 2005 5:34 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

mmm... pork roast and gummi worms... now that's good eatin'! Wink

my take on vegetarianism: if god had not meant for us to eat animals, he wouldn't have made them out of tasty meat.
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kevin

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Cowgirl UP!



Quit Date:
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Posts: 5029
Location: Ala

PostPosted: March 12, 2005 8:04 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

Laughing Laughing they are quite tasty...just do not want to get to know them first...I have bottle fed too many baby calfs with names like Moses and Lucky etc to meet the cow before I eat the beef...

Sorry Margaret...just got tickled at Kevin's take on vegetarians Laughing Laughing
I really hope you are feeling much better now....I have to admit, if I try to just eat all the healthy stuff, it just makes me want to eat more.....so I eat healthy until I want something else and I eat it too! Embarassed Embarassed At least you are making it to the gym Wink My weight is beginning to level out now so I hope to regain my composer and lose a few pounds.

You have had alot of medical problems Margaret and I am so proud that you have maintained your quit through all of them....I know you will do fine this time also. Do something special for yourself, like a long bath with candles burning...ya know the romantic thing...Ya do remember the romance part of life don't ya??? I get little flicks of memory about it every once and a while but nothing to hold on too. Laughing Laughing Laughing

If you have not seen the movie the Notebook yet? Rent it as a reward...it was really a nice story.
Kay
s
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marw



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Posts: 3634
Location: Chicago, IL

PostPosted: March 12, 2005 8:36 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

Kevin, you are so funny! Laughing My sentiments exactly....about the meat!
(And when my dog starts acting nervous around me--sorry, all you animal lovers--I know it's time to eat a steak!....ummm, sorry, Kay, but I didn't meet it first, so is that O.K.? Laughing

Actually, I do know what you mean, Kay, because my father used to have a cattle ranch. And when I was a little girl and lived on a farm, I used to have pet chickens and a pet duck. I just keep those thoughts tucked away in a "Pandora's" box in the back of my brain under lock and key! Laughing

Thanks for the movie idea, too! Very Happy I haven't seen it, and I will do that very thing! My reward day is being put off until tomorrow so I can go to the Garden Show here and go "wild" (I hope!) Very Happy It's at Navy Pier, too!

Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy
I have a vague memory of romance, too! Laughing That means to use the "rose" scented candles, right? Wink And the jasmine bath oil! Yeah, it's coming back! Wink
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Margaret
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Cowgirl UP!



Quit Date:
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PostPosted: March 13, 2005 12:41 AM    Post subject: Reply with quote

See, now that I know you can remember the good ole days, I know you are feeling better Laughing Laughing Laughing

I hope you have fun at the Garden Show....
Kay
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