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Expecting

 
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VolksWes



Quit Date:
June 27, 2007

Posts: 32
Location: Alabama

PostPosted: March 16, 2005 1:54 PM    Post subject: Expecting Reply with quote

I wasn't really sure which category this should go in.

Here where I work there is a woman who has been trying for years to conceive, yet never could. She happens to be a heavy smoker. Well a couple of months ago her doctor prescribed her something for a medical diagnosis. (not related to smoking or trying to get pregnant) Well low and behold this prescription happens to have an effect, and she gets pregnant maybe a week after starting it. Needless to say she hasn't stopped smoking yet, and I haven't noticed any attempt to, or much concern at all. I find this very hard to understand, with this being something that she has wanted for years, yet not willing to even try to quit or show any caring for her unborn child that she has been hoping for.

I know there are circumstances where women continue to smoke yet decrease the amount smoked during pregnancy, and that the stress during quitting can be high and in some cases potentially dangerous to a baby, but this woman showing no concern or attempt to quit, or even reduce the amount of intake just blows my mind.

Seems a bit selfish to me.

Anyway, I spotted her with cigarettes in hand heading down to take a break several times this morning, and It gave me the idea to do this photo and share it here. I may decide to secretly print a copy to put on the bulletin board in the hallway, where I know it will be seen. Several people have already mentioned her quitting with no result yet.



VW
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kevin
Site Admin


Quit Date:
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Posts: 9538
Location: cincinnati, oh

PostPosted: March 16, 2005 2:01 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

you've become quite a hand with photoshop, wes - good to see you! hope all is well with you... Smile
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kevin

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Dana Rae



Quit Date:
January 22, 2005

Posts: 201
Location: Palatka, Florida

PostPosted: March 16, 2005 6:33 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

Good idea VW POST IT!!! I was a smoker for over 30 years and during that time I had my three kids but I never smoked when I was pregnat!!! ITS JUST WRONG!!!! Dana
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Leona



Quit Date:
June 1, 2017

Posts: 1838
Location: Alpena, Michigan

PostPosted: March 16, 2005 8:07 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

I gotta say that in defensive of the woman she may not know the right or wrongs of quiting or maybe she just cannot do it at this point even want to at this point.

I know that when I was pregnant with my kids all 4 of the the only one I quit for was the first one and that was only because it made me violently ill. Wish I had stayed quit at the time it would of saved alot of grief later on when I did finally quit.

When and if this lady is ever ready she will do it on her own. Sorry to be such a party pooper but you can't make her quit and trying to force the issue will only make her resolve stronger to continue to smoke.

Sorry it is only my opinion.
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Cowgirl UP!



Quit Date:
July 26, 2004

Posts: 5029
Location: Ala

PostPosted: March 17, 2005 12:58 AM    Post subject: Reply with quote

I say post it! When I was pregnant, my doctors never said a word about not smoking during the pregnancy but today it is a no brainer....I know some would like to quit and just can't or think they can't....I just wish they would ban the damn things and be done with it.
Kay
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mtwilsonranch



Quit Date:
January 20, 2006

Posts: 1863
Location: nevada

PostPosted: March 17, 2005 1:54 AM    Post subject: Reply with quote

I had my children in the early 60's, the doctors never said anything about smoking, in fact they were smoking also....

This picture says it all......great message...

Pam

1 month, 20 hrs., 54 min free of nicotine and feeling GREAT Wink
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Seabrez



Quit Date:
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Posts: 4458
Location: Gulf Coast

PostPosted: March 17, 2005 10:52 AM    Post subject: Reply with quote

Well, I have mixed feelings here.
The picture brings truth, but in an offensive way. I have to lean towards what Leona said. I also smoked with all 4 of mine. I'm sitting here remembering back to that time. I knew others who quit smoking while pregnant. Even if I wanted to ,...I wouldn't have been able to. Luckily all my kids turned out ok. I know others aren't so lucky. A woman shouldn't smoke while carrying a baby. I agree with that 100%!!!!

Unfortunately, the sad fact is, the woman has to make the choice whether to quit or not. So, whether she is pregnant or not isn't the real issue. It's the issue that you can't force anyone to quit smoking regardless of all the benefits for themselves or for others. It's a choice they have to make for themselves, whether we agree with it or not. Posting the picture may totally piss her off, and then any hope of her quitting is gone. It's better to gently and without embarassing her or judging her bring the issue of quitting to her. When a person is embarassed, feels judged, or hurt, they will do the opposite. It'll throw up a wall around the heart to protect her against being hurt. This sign would be great on a billboard on a freeway for the general public, but to make a point where one person is targeted, it's a bad idea.....remember that woman has a heart and emotions just like you do.
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Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come. 2 Corn 5:17 NASB
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Fightn4life



Quit Date:
October 23, 2003

Posts: 1573
Location: Loysburg, PA

PostPosted: March 17, 2005 8:11 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

A picture speaks a thousand words. Phew... this one is intense.

Makes me sad I did not know the dangers of smoking back when I had my children. I was one that smoked in the Drs Office with my Dr.

We were even allowed to smoke in our hospital rooms. Oh how things have changed.

I sure can't go back but I can talk to my kids and grandkids about this terrible addiction. From first hand experience. Sad

Sandyz
512 free and healing
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Bonnie



Quit Date:
May 23, 2005

Posts: 16
Location: Oxford, Michigan

PostPosted: March 19, 2005 8:01 AM    Post subject: Smoking while pregnant Reply with quote

It is very possible the reality of the pregnancy has not hit this woman yet and my guess is she will quit soon after she begins to feel life moving inside her. I did.
And yes it is selfish but the reality of what you are doing to the baby doesn't hit until you can feel movement. The day I felt my baby move I never picked up another cigarette. (during my pregnancy and while nursing) Give her until her 16th week and see what happens. Remember the addiction is a strong one.
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lula



Quit Date:
March 12, 2005

Posts: 9
Location: london

PostPosted: April 14, 2005 10:31 AM    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hey

Ok so this post is a bit old but I wanted to give my opinion. I am 7 weeks pregnant this coming saturday and I quit when I conceived ( its a weird story but basically I didnt know I was pregnant but I quit one day out of the blue then 2 weeks later found out I am pregnant ). I haven't smoked since and will never smoke again.

Tha fact of the matter is...EVERYONE knows that smoking during pregnancy is a big no no. Years ago the dangers of smoking during pregnancy were not known but in this day and age you would have to be living under a rock to not be aware of the dangers!

There is no excuse to continue smoking during pregnancy and if anyone is that desperate to smoke then they know they can always start again once the baby is born. I'm sorry to be harsh but in my opinion anyone that cannot sacrifice 9 months of their "smoking life" to protect the health of they're baby doesn't deserve to be pregnant in the first place!

I'm done!

lou Very Happy
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Angel



Quit Date:
November 11, 2004

Posts: 208
Location: MI

PostPosted: April 14, 2005 11:45 AM    Post subject: Reply with quote

I have to agree with Leona here. Of course, smoking while pregnant is the height of selfishness, or is it the depth of addiction? Your concern is well placed but I suspect the method won't have the intended result.

I have two children and I quit smoking with the first and smoked with the second. Several people expressed their concern and shock that I smoked while pregnant. What they didn't know is that I hated myself for smoking while I was pregnant - it wasn't as though I never thought of it or didn't realize it was bad for the baby. Of course I knew I shouldn't be smoking and everyone's attempts to 'inform' me of that were completely demoralizing. What would have worked? I don't know - my guess is someone would have had to become completely aggressive and take over my life and force me to quit (which is illegal = kidnapping). If my husband had teamed up with me in a quit, I think I would have gone for that too.

I know it's frustrating to do nothing when it's so obvious that someone is doing something wrong. Every person is different and responds to different approaches. I would suggest giving your coworker the benefit of the doubt and try talking with her. Tell her your story and just let her know that if she wants to know more you're happy to help, rather than judge.
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