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what the hell happened

 
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michelleanne



Quit Date:
January 1, 2005

Posts: 279
Location: germany

PostPosted: May 14, 2005 12:46 PM    Post subject: what the hell happened Reply with quote

Sad Sad so there i was last week at work when in a space of about ten minutes i almost lost my job,my husband and my best friend.i work with my best friend and my husband is my boss.i lost complete control over something quite simple.i got in a slanging match which was awfull and then my husband sent me home he was very angry.i have said i was really sorry and spent all week trying to make it up but i fear things will never be the same again.i know this would not have happened if i smoked.i feel really cross and sad with myself.i havnt smoked but i have been close to it.michelle.
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jlynn931



Quit Date:
September 22, 2016

Posts: 785
Location: MA

PostPosted: May 14, 2005 2:00 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

michelle,
i can't see that smoking is the only thing that would have stoped you from losing control. maybe there is another stress relief method that maybe you could try to stop it from happening again? and i know if you are anything like me, deep breathing is the last thing you want to hear but it can work.
also, i know that ou know that smoking now WON'T make anything better! think about what you are saying, why would it not have happened if you smoked? i think that's Scowling Demon trying to trick with poor excuses to go back! you can get through this!
jenny
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londa



Quit Date:
July 28, 2004

Posts: 2469
Location: new york, USA

PostPosted: May 14, 2005 3:06 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

Michelle, it takes two! You might have blown up, but there also needs to be forgiveness here. If a person sincerely says they are sorry, the other person should forgive. Give him time. And next time, count to ten, breath deep. Believe me I know from experience. Most people that know me, can't believe I loose my temper. But I am human. It's true, I am! Shocked
I pinched myself and it hurt! I feel pain just like other people. I yell, I get mean, I say I am sorry, I cry, etc. etc. This is part of life. People who are non smokers go through the same thing. We are just use to picking up that cigarette when angry! Maybe you need to excuse yourself and put a pretzel rod in your mouth and go outside. Wink

You just hang in there! Wink

God Bless You!

Love, Londa
_________________

My name is Londa. I am 57 and I act like I'm 20. I love to laugh and smile. The more the better. Being kind to someone is the best thing you can do.
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Leona



Quit Date:
June 1, 2017

Posts: 1838
Location: Alpena, Michigan

PostPosted: May 14, 2005 8:35 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

Add these words to your vocabulary. It is a must for all who have just quit smoking and it was recomended on another board FFS for quiting smoking by some of the long timers.

"I am sorry I did not mean that I just quit smoking and I am sincerely sorry and do not know what I am saying. Please forgive me"


When you get irriatable and anry remember to say those words to those who are on the receiveing end. For I am sure you do not mean to be that way and it nicodemon's way of trying to reagain you as his supplier.
_________________

Quiting smoking is like a fine wine ......
It just gets better with age.
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marw



Quit Date:
-

Posts: 3634
Location: Chicago, IL

PostPosted: May 14, 2005 9:57 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

I can tell you from experience that smoking would not have helped. I have had this very thing happen both when I was smoking and after I quit. Sometimes things just happen. We are human. Know that it is not all your fault. Nothing ever is. Your friend should sincerely accept your apology. Give her some time. She will.

You are doing a good job with your quit. Keep that up. It's worth it.
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Margaret
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kevin
Site Admin


Quit Date:
-

Posts: 9538
Location: cincinnati, oh

PostPosted: May 14, 2005 10:08 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

it may not have happened if you were still smoking, michelle, but that would only have been because you would have been feeding your addiction in order to stuff your anger. why do you think that it's such a bad thing to get angry that you'd want to poison yourself for it?

it's normal to get angry; it doesn't make you a bad person. have you tried to identify where your anger is coming from and address the issue head-on? for instance, if your friend said something that hurt you, did you go to them and say that you found what they said hurtful? sometimes just the act of saying it out loud is enough to release the emotion.

michelle, you are so worth staying free; don't let junkie thinking cloud your judgment.
_________________

keep choosing life!

kevin

the zen of the quit
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Barbara K.



Quit Date:
December 23, 2004

Posts: 5977

PostPosted: May 16, 2005 12:09 AM    Post subject: Reply with quote

Very Happy Michelle,

From my own experience, all smoking did for me is harm me. And like Kevin said something to the effect, smoking is just a cover up for some issues. Sorry Kevin, I forgot how you put it but trying to remember. Please don't ever feel that smoking will ever solve anything because it doesn't.

Blessings,
_________________

Obstacles don't have to stop you. If you run into a wall, don't turn arouind and give up. Figure out how to climb it, go through it, or work around it.

Blessings,
Barbara K.
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