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Mental/Emotional Issues w/ Quitting HELP!!!

 
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xenafriend97



Quit Date:
July 30, 2007

Posts: 5

PostPosted: October 15, 2007 3:28 PM    Post subject: Mental/Emotional Issues w/ Quitting HELP!!! Reply with quote

This is my 2nd time around quitting. My first quit date was July 17, 2007. Fell off the wagon two weeks later, but jumped right back on and have been smoke free since July 30, 2007. (smoker since 14 -- 29 now) I used the patches, and they worked/helped with the nictoine withdrawals; the habit of it was a little harder, and it helped to "pretend" to smoke (have cig in hand not lit) for the first 2-3 weeks, until I didn't feel the urge to actually hold one anymore.
Here's my problem: I've noticed lately (month, month 1/2) that I get upset really easier now. I get very pissed off very quickly and I can't seem to control what I say or think. You know how you get when you're really REALLY ticked off? That's how I am when ever something upsets me. Then I think about a cig, and how I want one just to calm me down. Haven't done it yet though, b/c I don't want to waste my 2+ months. I've tried redirecting my mind onto something else, (kinda works about 1/2 time), I've tried slow breathing techniques (pisses me off more). Its not just the madness either, it could also be being sad, or depressed or whatever.
Is there anyone who has a suggestion on what I can do or stop doing or something? I need something, I just don't know what. Any ideas?
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texas2step



Quit Date:
-

Posts: 793
Location: Texas

PostPosted: October 15, 2007 4:30 PM    Post subject: Hey there Reply with quote

You might want to talk to your doctor about the anger. You should not be so angry, even if you were not quitting smoking that kind of anger is very unhealthy and hard on your body and brain. It didn't happen to me that way this time but some years ago when I quit for a while I was angry. I don't remember what I did but I think it just passed. I was younger then.

When I started this quit 14 months ago I had a few times when I felt a tense bit of anger but I woke up one day and realized that was doing it "the hard way" and being unhappy or angry didn't help me at all so I worked on getting a better attitude.

Did you knwo that you can fake a smile and it will help you feel better? I didn't know that but I found out. If I felt myself feeling mad or deprived or having a major crave for a smoke I would stop what I was doing and count to 10 then smile as hard as my face could smile and before long it felt good to smile. Doing it while looking at myself in the mirror helped too cause then it started being funny to look at my own face all tense then smiling like an idiot into the mirror and it would make me laugh out loud which is even better than just smiling for one's attitude. It's been medically proven that even a fake smile is healthy to brain and body.

I suggest you try cheering up on your own, you can quit smoking the hard way and make it harder on yourself with anger and sadness or you can say what the heck and get on with it and be happy. If trying to change your attitude doesn't help you probably should seek medical attention or at least talk to your doctor because some people do get depressed when they quit smoking. Sadly they usually think going back to smoking will make them "healed" somehow and they won't be depressed anymore. Well they won't be as long as they feed the "monster" its nicotine.

Just get in touch with yourself. Do you really need to be angry or depressed? If not and you cannot get out of the funk, seek your doctor's help.

Just my two cents worth but I hope you work it out and don't smoke again.

Texas
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Anonymous

Quit: 8/14/06
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kevin
Site Admin


Quit Date:
-

Posts: 9538
Location: cincinnati, oh

PostPosted: October 15, 2007 9:22 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

when we were smoking, we could always hide behind our own private "smokescreen" whenever we felt the need, just by lighting up. now that we don't have the smokescreen any more, we have to learn to deal with the stuff that we used to hide behind it. it can be tough at first, but you get used to it. here's my rule of thumb:

if the thing you're pissed off about is important, do something about it. if it isn't, let it go, move on to the next thing you need to do, and get over it. life's too short.
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kevin

the zen of the quit
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Cowgirl UP!



Quit Date:
July 26, 2004

Posts: 5029
Location: Ala

PostPosted: October 15, 2007 10:00 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

I remember using my anger as an excuse to smoke...better put out the fire!!! It was just an excuse like all the rest...I know that now but I sure did not know it then....I have found Goji juice to be my personal salvation as I am not one who likes to take pills.....however, I did take prescribed medication until the doc and I thought I could be civil again...
Kay
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Lady



Quit Date:
July 1, 2005

Posts: 378
Location: Georgia

PostPosted: October 16, 2007 7:53 AM    Post subject: Reply with quote

Like the others I remember those feelings as well. You are perfectly normal. Quitting just sucks! There were several times early in the quit that I had to put my attitude in check. I remember driving everyone around me insane and saying to them, Wouldn't it be better if I smoked? My then 16 year old daughter said "Bitch away Lady, Just don't smoke". It was then I realized that being angry, depressed, upset, whatever emotion you choose to insert here wasn't an excuse to smoke and the most important thing was that I didn't light up no matter how I felt.

I kept telling myself that everyday was one day closer to never feeling this way again. I made a choice to quit smoking. I didn't HAVE to do it. No one was making me. It was a choice. I could smoke any time I wanted to but I didn't want to anymore.

I took deep breaths, sucked on peppermints and took a lot of walks in those early days. I also cried a lot of tears and keep pushing forward. You will survive this time. I promise. You will be stronger for it and you will have a sense of self confidence like you have never known before! There will be a new "you" and you will really like the person you have become. Keep marching forward. One step at a time, one day at a time. You CAN do this!
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Seabrez



Quit Date:
-

Posts: 4458
Location: Gulf Coast

PostPosted: October 16, 2007 4:07 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

Well, as everyone has said....it's a choice of attitude. But right now as you are experiencing these feelings it doesn't feel that way. But it is.

It's a matter of being honest with yourself. Ask yourself....why am I pissed? And go from there and deal with the issue of why.

Are you pissed because you feel a victim to quitting...like you a giving up something? or are you pissed at something else? Whether the anger is from feeling about the quit...or feelings of life in general....being honest and honing in on the reason and cause is the first step. After that it's a matter of coping and dealing with it. I like what Kevin said...it's a good measuring line for what is important to get worked up over and what is best just to let be and let it roll like water on a duck's back.

Be honest....and just face the issues...and in time it gets easier to recognize and deal with the issues of life.

Hugs
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Living in Freedom
Deb

Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come. 2 Corn 5:17 NASB
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Wanda



Quit Date:
March 15, 2004

Posts: 425
Location: Carlisle, PA

PostPosted: October 17, 2007 7:46 AM    Post subject: Reply with quote

i have been quit for well over 3 years. to this day i have not forgotten the mean stage that i went thru right around the 3rd month.

i don't know why i was so angry. well actually i think it has to do with the stages of grieving, and anger is one of them.

hang tuff, it will pass.
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Wanda
Quit Date 03/15/04
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xenafriend97



Quit Date:
July 30, 2007

Posts: 5

PostPosted: October 17, 2007 2:25 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thank you to everyone. Later on that day, I went to my best friend's house (I watch my 10 yr-old "nephew") and I was still.......simmering, I guess you could say. Things, little things were just pissing me off, and finally I was on the phone w/ my best friend, and she kept telling me to just let it out, just let it out. And man, did I ROAR!! lol Anything and Anybody was a target! My husband, my nephew, the pets, the furniture, the house, my best friend........everybody got "shot" for the next 1/2 hour. My husband took my nephew outside so he didn't have to hear all the things that were coming out of my mouth. And you know what my best friend did? She just sat there on the phone, listening to me go on about every stinking little thing; I don't want to say that she "egged" me on, but that's what it felt like, cause she knew I had to get EVERYTHING out. After 1/2 hour, I then bawled my head off for another 1/2 hour. You know how you have to have a really good cry every once in awhile? Take that times 10. After I got everything out, I was exhausted, mentally and physically. But I felt so much better, and I know now that I was really ... not angry, but frustrated. I don't think it had anything to do w/ a cigarette. That was just an excuse. Something to fall back on. But I got through it, w/ the help of God and my family, and friends. And each and everyone of you that responded also. Thank you for being there.
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Seabrez



Quit Date:
-

Posts: 4458
Location: Gulf Coast

PostPosted: October 17, 2007 3:07 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

Xena,

That's the way to do it!!! Good for you for getting it out of your system.
Nothing like letting off steam and venting....it does clear the air and the soul! Wink

And your friend is a keeper! Wink

Hugs Girl!!! Keep that quit!
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Deb

Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come. 2 Corn 5:17 NASB
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kevin
Site Admin


Quit Date:
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Posts: 9538
Location: cincinnati, oh

PostPosted: October 17, 2007 10:34 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

Smile
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kevin

the zen of the quit
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