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It is not the smoking

 
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Cowgirl UP!



Quit Date:
July 26, 2004

Posts: 5029
Location: Ala

PostPosted: September 24, 2004 1:10 PM    Post subject: It is not the smoking Reply with quote

Hi ya'll,

I just had to write....I think I have figured out what the yearning, burning, hunger episode was about yesterday....I am hatching...coming out of my cacoon, evolving or whatever you wish to call it and I see where so much of my life has gone.

I need something for anxiety right now, not because of smoking but because my 30 year old daughter will not leave me alone. I know that sounds horrible and I think of Barbd everytime I have such a thought but she just sucks the life out of me.

She has called three times before 11:00 am on trivial stuff...can't get anything done...then wants me to watch kids while she goes to look for winter clothes and bedding for the little girl. I would not mind but I finally get everything done and vaccumn on Friday and would like it to look nice for more than 1 hour. That boy of hers demolishes everything...which is why she has no friends to go visit and why she cannot take them with her.

I was at the fair with the little devil Wed night and I think that is part of my problem yesterday..worn out.. He is horrible never seen a kid like this...you spank him and he will hit you back..seldom does he cry...I told the doctor he had 666 somewhere on his body but I could not find it. The little girl is an angel and she even tries to stay away from him. They are constantly calling for us to go out to eat with them (which is a real disaster) or go anywhere they think about going.

I hate to say this but after 30 years this Tuesday, I want this child to get off my hip and give me some peace..She was my hellion anyway...never lets up, constantly getting over her head..Why don't I just slam that back door in her face??? Because she tried to committ suicide when she was 17 after I tried to get her to deal with issues on her own...I have been her voice, her strength, her everything ever since...I guess I am afraid she will do it again..even though I know that would not be an option with her now!

OK thanks, I feel much better getting that out just delete it. Laughing Laughing I guess I had better go get a shower and give up on cleaning the carpet today...sure she will show up to see what is wrong.
]Kay
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Melody



Quit Date:
August 19, 2004

Posts: 1103
Location: Ontario

PostPosted: September 24, 2004 1:47 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

I think you and I are having similar days. Next time the little devil tries hitting tickle him till he cries. Honestly tears are all you are asking for. I mean it give it a try. He will soon learn you won't stop till he behaves. My youngest daughter sounds like yours and she has tried to suck me into her vortex for years. She actually tried the suicide thing in the winter just before she left home as some how it became my problem she had a baby early and at that time I refused to take over her responsibility for her to be running the roads so to speak. Now I've went one step further and went to court and have joint custody with my grandson's father. He stays here Monday to Friday and goes with his Dad on weekends. He deserves the life we gave her and I've walked away from her for the time being as she refuses to help herself. I'd say cut the strings it's you or her. Good luck.
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Cowgirl UP!



Quit Date:
July 26, 2004

Posts: 5029
Location: Ala

PostPosted: September 24, 2004 2:33 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thanks Melody, I guess I should have taken the Buspar before I wrote but it really got to me this morning. She is a really good mother and stays at home with them, in fact she probably over does it.

The little boy ( who I dearly love) had the colic for almost a year due to being allergic to milk. He has screamed so much he has a hernia that will probably require surgery on his belly button. He has not slept all night but one or two nights and I know my daughter is exhausted. I try to help her as much as I can but sometimes she gets so pushy I explode. I guess the pushy comes when she needs me the most. Now, she is not answering her home or cell phone because I guess I hurt her feelings. She has had a heart condition that is birth related also which tires her easily.

I came back on to delete this but can't so sorry everyone...next time I will take the tablet, a shower and then post if necessary.
Kay
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bwick18



Quit Date:
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Posts: 580
Location: Florida

PostPosted: September 24, 2004 3:12 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

Kay,
There is no need for you to take the Buspar pre posting, we are here to hear the full story for you. I don't have any great advice but certianly will always have an ear for ya to yap in. You should not feel selfish in any of your feelings either. there comes a time when Parents need to feel unhounded by their children.
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After the rain comes the rainbow- I will get my rainbow back
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Melody



Quit Date:
August 19, 2004

Posts: 1103
Location: Ontario

PostPosted: September 24, 2004 3:19 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

There was absolutely nothing wrong with what you posted. Sometimes it's hard to realize that the 18 years we all seemed to sign on for has extended and is likely in my case to have just added 15 years. I must admit I'm happier since she flew the coop and left my chickadee behind as she was just screwing up his head as it is always all about her and never the rest of us. Don't for a minute think this does not mean I love her as I do very much in fact. What it does mean is her actions are unacceptable to me and with those I can't live nor will I put my grandson in her path to much. It sounds like you and your daughter could benefit from just a mother and daughter day spend some of the money you have saved on cigs hire a sitter and head to the spa. Very Happy Nothing better than to be pampered. My oldest daughter and I take one day a week just for us and leave hubby with the grandson. It is nice he has started JK this year so I have 2 days one week and 3 on the other. I do help at the school but only 2 mornings a week. You will not believe this one as it is tooooo much for most to take but my brother is raising 4 kids on his own and I need a couple days to handle their shopping and housekeeping. I do that on days when the grandson is home as he is a great help in those areas. He can fold laundry like a pro and is great at cleaning up toys and unloading and loading the dishwasher. He has become a team player at an early age and he will never I pray feel life is Just all about him.
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tsjay49



Quit Date:
January 1, 2004

Posts: 1863
Location: Kentucky

PostPosted: September 24, 2004 4:19 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

Makes it easy to understand why some animals eat their young, doesn't it?

Smile

Tom
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londa



Quit Date:
July 28, 2004

Posts: 2469
Location: new york, USA

PostPosted: September 24, 2004 4:24 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

Laughing Laughing Laughing Tom! Laughing Laughing

Love Londa
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My name is Londa. I am 57 and I act like I'm 20. I love to laugh and smile. The more the better. Being kind to someone is the best thing you can do.
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Melody



Quit Date:
August 19, 2004

Posts: 1103
Location: Ontario

PostPosted: September 24, 2004 4:27 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

Tom where do come up with this stuff Laughing Laughing
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Cowgirl UP!



Quit Date:
July 26, 2004

Posts: 5029
Location: Ala

PostPosted: September 24, 2004 7:14 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

Well, I feel horrible...she called the last time to tell me she was going to shower and pick up Willa from school( I heard that part and told her I did not know what her Dad had Planed today) the part I did not hear was and they were going to go on to the shop and get back before nap time. DUH?
She said she was sorry she was trying not to mess up my day. When I finally got her to answer (cell phone in car) the kids were crying. The reason...they wanted to come see MawMaw and she had told them no. I told her to bring them on and she could go to KMart and leave them with me for her to have a break.

She got here at 2:20 and did not leave for Kmart until 3:30. I was feeding them when she came in at 5:30 and they were ill as could be. They would not take a nap..she did not put them down before she left and they were holy terror the whole time. The girl being worse than the baby this time...he just wanted to stay outside.

By the time she left Hubby is a roaring lion because he had a bad day at work and I am sitting here going ok and where do I fit in. Oh yeah someone is standing on me. Laughing Laughing I really miss the smokescreen I would be chain smoking about now...try to help one and catch it from the other...Geezzzz It GETS OLD. One of these days I may just get in my car and drive...get me a little R&R but mainly peace... Laughing Laughing Laughing

Hubby said well do you want to go get something to eat and I am like uh YEAH that would be nice....what more do they want and what is left for me to give. UGHHHHHHHHHHHH .

That's all folks, the next post will have a brand new attitude...this one sucks.
Laughing Laughing Kay
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ms_tapestry



Quit Date:
October 21, 2009

Posts: 2574
Location: Seminole, TX

PostPosted: September 24, 2004 7:35 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

Kay, I am so sorry your day sucked. And it did, didn't it? I had a peach bellini with lunch and it vastly improved my whole attitude. I hope you have a great dinner with the lion. You deserve it. Very Happy
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You must do the very thing you think you cannot do.
~ Eleanor Roosevelt
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Cowgirl UP!



Quit Date:
July 26, 2004

Posts: 5029
Location: Ala

PostPosted: September 24, 2004 10:07 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

Yes, my day did suck and I could not even have a margarita with my dinner since I live in a dry county. But, what I did have with my dinner was about a 4 inch hairy BUTT CRACK. Yes you read that right a 4 inch hairy BUTT CRACK staring right at me! Laughing Laughing I was trying to eat my shrimp but this guy kept shifting his weight and the crack of his butt kept popping up like it was saying Bite Me or something.... with the day I have had, believe me the thought definitely occured to me! Laughing Laughing Hubby said well quit looking at it if it is bothering you...I wanted to say OH, not a bother at All chomp chomp on the guys butt. Laughing Laughing I bet next time he would check his pants at a restaurant...

Came in the door, phone was ringing...daughter says they are on the way to the ER little devil climbed and fell...cutting his eyelid. For once, I told her to call me and let me know what they said...a few minutes later she called back saying the bleeding had stopped and they were not going....ok nerve stands erect...nerve misfires..... Laughing Laughing I guess since I was not going, she decided she was not going to go either. Rolling Eyes Rolling Eyes
Kay
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bake10



Quit Date:
October 20, 2004

Posts: 407
Location: Michigan

PostPosted: September 25, 2004 8:40 AM    Post subject: Reply with quote

Kay My goodness I read this whole post, it sounds like you need a relaxing vacation.

My sister has a little boy like that, it is very difficult to be around him, I can totally relate. I am proud of you for taking care of him for your daughter, can you emagine what she goes through in a day, she definetly needs the break. How old is he?

We think once our children are grown they won't be so needy, but I think when they are on there own and have a family, they need us more.
Take care, be good to yourself. Jeri
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bwick18



Quit Date:
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Posts: 580
Location: Florida

PostPosted: September 25, 2004 4:43 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

Oh my God Kay, You need a cruze to the Bahamas and some pina coladas. God Bless you!!
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Cowgirl UP!



Quit Date:
July 26, 2004

Posts: 5029
Location: Ala

PostPosted: September 25, 2004 5:02 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

Laughing Laughing and this was just one day...have been told through the years I should write a book...but who would believe it and now...I can't remember half of it Laughing Laughing Laughing
Kay
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bake10



Quit Date:
October 20, 2004

Posts: 407
Location: Michigan

PostPosted: September 25, 2004 5:56 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

Kay, I thought the same about my life, I should write a book. It would take my whole life to write a book . Jeri
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