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Pamela
Quit Date: -
Posts: 3542 Location: Gardiner, NY
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Posted: April 3, 2006 12:57 PM Post subject: Bizarre Behavior |
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This is just an observation for all of you who may just be starting out on this journey.
I just took a trip to the bank from the office. As I drove up to the drive-through, there was a teller from the bank outside smoking, a pretty normal occurance. I used to do this dozens of times a day.
However, for the first time, I realized just how bizarre this smoking thing is. A woman standing, alone, behind the bank building, rapidly puffing away on a burning white stick in order to get the maximum dosage of chemicals into her body in the shortest amount of time.
For all the thousands of times I did this in the past, it was taken for granted and "normal".
Today, I saw it for what it was.....a truly bizarre behavior, that has no rational at all.
Now I understand what non smokers were thinking. I can see how they could just not understand why anyone would deliberately do this to themselves, as it made no common sense whatsoever.
Hey, I get it Today, I actually see the "bizarre-ness" of this behavior.
Why did it take me so long to come to this realization? I will use language translation as an analogy. When you first learn another language, you have to learn a new word for every word in English. You have to learn, and then finally understand, the grammer in the new language. You then have to "use" the language on a regular basis in order to really become familiar with it and feel comfortable using it.
Then, one day, you finally realize that you are not "translating" in your head, but you are actually visualizing and thinking in your new learned language
I guess everything takes time, and especially those things that are worth waiting for. Believe me, you will feel comfortable with not smoking long before the 2 year mark. However, at some point down the road, you will actually "be" a non smoker, and not just be like a non smoker.
I'd welcome thoughts and comments about this. _________________
FIVE + years of freedom and loving it! |
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alleghany
Quit Date: -
Posts: 2049
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Posted: April 3, 2006 1:24 PM Post subject: |
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Your "translation" analogy is perfect!
I think the transition takes place sometime into the second year. After experiencing a year of firsts, the next year begins to seal the deal on viewing oneself as a non-smoker.
My recent experience....a freind who smokes came to visit. She commented on how few people in my area smoke. As a non-smoker I am surprised how many actually are outside smoking. I notice the smokers, as you mentioned, because of their bizarre behavior.
Thanks for the thought provoking post. _________________
Face your fears.
Quit date: June 6, 2004 |
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iwantosing
Quit Date: -
Posts: 338 Location: Pennsylvania
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Posted: April 3, 2006 8:26 PM Post subject: |
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i agree pam, many people i love smoke and i watch them and think how bizarre the behavior is. they stink, they cough, they look unhealthy(even the young ones have a pallor to them that non smokers don't have), i don't want to nag them cause people that used to smoke have a terrible reputation so i don't say anything but it sure makes me sad. peg _________________
My name is Peg, I decided I wanted to sing to the Lord, run with my son, laugh and learn to whistle, the cigs had to go!! Quit Date 3/28/05
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mtwilsonranch
Quit Date: January 20, 2006
Posts: 1863 Location: nevada
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Posted: April 3, 2006 8:53 PM Post subject: |
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Great Post Pamela,
I am a non smoker who is learning to become a non smoker (makes sense?)
I am so looking forward to the day when I will feel normal without being "the drug induced normal"...
Yes this is a learning process, = understanding= a new me
Thank you again Pam,
Pam _________________
Right Now, this minute, this hour, this day, I choose not to feed my addiction.... |
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Lori
Quit Date: March 18, 2006
Posts: 521 Location: Pennsylvania, USA
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Posted: April 4, 2006 11:15 AM Post subject: |
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Good stuff girls!! Thanks Pamela, Alleghany, and Peg. The insights of The Elders are like manna from heaven to me.
Lori |
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Pamela
Quit Date: -
Posts: 3542 Location: Gardiner, NY
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Posted: April 4, 2006 11:29 AM Post subject: |
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Yeesh, Lori. I don't know if I like the sound of that. Elders?
I know what you mean Sometimes the knowledge that others before me got through the process......well, some days it was the only thing that kept me going. _________________
FIVE + years of freedom and loving it! |
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kannprint
Quit Date: April 10, 2004
Posts: 4988 Location: St. Louis, MO
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Posted: April 4, 2006 11:41 AM Post subject: |
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Boy, Pamela, you hit the proverbial nail on it's proverbial head. How stupid was it to rush outdoors in all kinds of weather just for a fix of chemicals that we knew were going to ruin our health? Thank God (and Kevin) we're all on the way to a richer life.
Thanks for the post, Pamela. Great thinking _________________
LIVE WELL, LAUGH OFTEN, LOVE MUCH.
Jo |
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Lori
Quit Date: March 18, 2006
Posts: 521 Location: Pennsylvania, USA
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Posted: April 4, 2006 1:18 PM Post subject: |
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Hey Pamela,
Sorry, was kinda rummaging around for the mot juste there ... looks like I found the mot injuste
Does it aid my defense to point out that I did also call you all "girls?"
Lori |
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alleghany
Quit Date: -
Posts: 2049
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Posted: April 4, 2006 8:04 PM Post subject: |
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Thanks for the laugh, girls!
I'll take "elders". I remember seeing so many here's "day's free" and being just like a 6 year old looking up at the cool teenagers. I so wanted to have their "time free". Fortunately, the six year old in me was finally looking up to a healthy, caring lifestyle!
Thank you all! _________________
Face your fears.
Quit date: June 6, 2004 |
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Deb
Quit Date: February 5, 2010
Posts: 967 Location: North Carolina (Originally New York)
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Posted: April 5, 2006 7:44 AM Post subject: |
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Wow, I've never took notice until lately (the people huddling under doorways in the rain ) just how insane this addiction really is. People will go anywhere, anytime just to endanger themselves and get their fix. OMG...........I am proud to say, that I don't look like a raving lunatic anymore outdoors in the rain, picking up my last smoke that I just dropped on the ground (but need my fix....germs, 1 million footsteps in that very spot.......who cares) to smoke it anyway.......did I also mention a very DIRTY AND DISGUSTING HABIT!!!!!!
I am thankful to be free, thanks for posting this Pam.
Deb
92 days free |
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kevin Site Admin
Quit Date: -
Posts: 9538 Location: cincinnati, oh
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Posted: April 5, 2006 10:13 AM Post subject: |
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i think there's also a large dose of denial and rationalization in the behaviors we engaged in as smokers, pam: at some level, we knew that smoking was a self-destructive -- and bizarre -- behavior, so we had to deny the self-destructive aspect (because rational people don't willingly destroy themselves, and we were rational, weren't we?) and rationalize the bizarreness away...
but your point about why it takes so long is well taken; we spent so long speaking 'smokerese' as our native language that it takes a long time to learn to think in -- and speak -- 'freeish' like a native. _________________
keep choosing life!
kevin
the zen of the quit |
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Kerry
Quit Date: May 4, 2004
Posts: 862 Location: Illinois
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Posted: April 6, 2006 11:58 PM Post subject: |
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I agree with Kevin Pam, because after almost 2 years, I still feel slightly jealous of them. Now I know THAT'S bizaare, but I do. Not that I have plans of going back, but denial can be a beautiful thing. It allows you to face nothing and as non-smokers we face it ALL without our smoke screen. I'm glad that I am where I am - but I can't wait to say "I've arrived!" Kerry |
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Barbara K.
Quit Date: December 23, 2004
Posts: 5977
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Posted: April 7, 2006 4:52 AM Post subject: |
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Interesting.
Blessings, _________________
Obstacles don't have to stop you. If you run into a wall, don't turn arouind and give up. Figure out how to climb it, go through it, or work around it.
Blessings,
Barbara K. |
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marw
Quit Date: -
Posts: 3634 Location: Chicago, IL
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Posted: April 9, 2006 3:13 AM Post subject: |
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This was a great post! I never spoke another language, so I'm not sure how the translation goes, but I think that's what happens. Also, I think I started "translating" quite early into my quit, because I remember even while I still had craves thinking how bizarre it was to smoke. (I still had to overcome it, however.)
I have a lot of strange feelings sometimes about smokers and smoking. Mostly I just can't stand it and it gets on my nerves, and makes me ill, but then at times I feel at loose ends and know that it is because I used to grab a cigarette....I don't exactly want to smoke....well, I don't at all....but I just get edgy about it. At the same time I feel horrified by what they are doing. I expect I will always have some weirded-out feelings about smoking, but at least I don't do it anymore, and that is what counts for me!
Thanks for the thought-provoking post! _________________
Margaret |
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londa
Quit Date: July 28, 2004
Posts: 2469 Location: new york, USA
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Posted: April 10, 2006 5:39 PM Post subject: |
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Quote: |
However, for the first time, I realized just how bizarre this smoking thing is. A woman standing, alone, behind the bank building, rapidly puffing away on a burning white stick in order to get the maximum dosage of chemicals into her body in the shortest amount of time. |
I never looked at it that way. I always looked at it as my relaxation time. BUt YOU are totally correct! It is far from being relaxing....it's more like getting your fix and in a hurry!
Thanks for sharing this with us...
God Bless
Love, Londa _________________
My name is Londa. I am 57 and I act like I'm 20. I love to laugh and smile. The more the better. Being kind to someone is the best thing you can do. |
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