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justdebbie
Quit Date: August 1, 2004
Posts: 494 Location: iowa
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Posted: June 25, 2006 10:07 PM Post subject: |
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Sending you HUGS!!!!! |
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ms_tapestry
Quit Date: October 21, 2009
Posts: 2574 Location: Seminole, TX
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Posted: June 27, 2006 6:18 AM Post subject: |
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sweetie - i know you are upset and angry, but you aren't in charge of this world, God is. relax, breathe, cry, scream, rant and rave, eat some comfort food, go ride fat gus and know, without a doubt, that what is intended to happen will happen. smoking isn't an option, ending it isn't an option, so don't even go there. there's a country song playing on the radio all the time now. i should know who it is, but i don't. anyway, a few of the lines go as follows:
But the good news
Is there's angels everywhere out on the street
Holding out a hand to pull you back upon your feet
The one's that you been dragging for so long
You're on your knees
You might as well be free
Guess what I'm saying
If you're going through hell
Keep on going, Don't slow down
If you're scared, don't show it
You might get out
Before the devil even knows you're there
you've been to hell and back more than once so i know you know how to get through this. know that you are in my thoughts and prayers ms. kay. just say the word and tawanda and i will ride down for the weekend. . . hmmm, how far is it from fort worth to 'bama??? _________________
Tonya
You must do the very thing you think you cannot do.
~ Eleanor Roosevelt |
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Cowgirl UP!
Quit Date: July 26, 2004
Posts: 5029 Location: Ala
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Posted: June 29, 2006 10:34 PM Post subject: |
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Thanks to all who have posted, I try to get on when I am tired so I know I will keep my mouth shut before it out runs my brain again...
Ya know, I have been taking care of this family for so long, ( even as a child) that I forget I do not have to be the one who saves the day. I am trying hard to let it go....but it is not working...I am so angry, hurt, and I cannot trust anyone involved in this mess. I am just as upset with the bank and the attorney I saw yesterday as I am my sister.
I am not smoking although I am carrying around some mega anxiety....I have swam so much today, I am waterloged and exhausted....
love to you all,
Kay _________________
All with a little help from my friends, COWGIRL UP |
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londa
Quit Date: July 28, 2004
Posts: 2469 Location: new york, USA
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Posted: June 30, 2006 6:51 AM Post subject: |
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Kay, I grew up with a mentally ill mother and a alcohol father. I took care of them while in high school, (even though I was a very very immature person myself... won't go there now)
But I know what it is like to always be taking care of someone who is mentally ill. One time a professional told me I needed to let my mother make her own mistakes. But I said, "It will fall back on me...etc.etc."
But I listened, and let her make her own mistakes, and yes sometimes I picked up the pieces.
She is gone now, but I would take her back in a minute. My life was not my own, but losing her was like losing a daughter, because I took care of her for so long.
Hang in there Kay. I too thought it was my duty to "save the world", but then I realized, God is the one in control. Thank Him for that!!!
Hate to see what the world would be like if I was in control
So have some ice-tea, along with a hotfudge sundae, and just watch the birds and thank God for all the wonderful things in your life.
I will keep your sister in my prayers. And I will keep your name close to my heart to always lift you up to God.
Love, Londa _________________
My name is Londa. I am 57 and I act like I'm 20. I love to laugh and smile. The more the better. Being kind to someone is the best thing you can do. |
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Cowgirl UP!
Quit Date: July 26, 2004
Posts: 5029 Location: Ala
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Posted: June 30, 2006 11:10 PM Post subject: |
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Thanks for sharing this with us Londa.....the closeness one feels to those who have also traveled this journey is very dear to me....it gives me strength and courage to do what I must to ensure my sister's safety and well being....I am feeling better today as Adult Protective Services went to her apt and called asking for directions to my nephews....I do not know if they were home or not but I feel so relieved just to know I am beginning to get somewhere.....
now the bank, well I paid a bill on the credit card and it was posted just fine....then when it was sent to the bank to be taken out of the account, the frozen status must have forced it back...now they have a missing check, half posted and I still can't close the account.....I really will not get her attention until she sees that I have closed it instead of her or that lady catches her at home....then, this whole thing will change.
Thanks for letting me hang out the laundry again and for the courage to make the calls I had to make....I have also contacted the local police that were her husbands partners before he passed away.....hopefully they will be able to help her see the need for change.
Kay _________________
All with a little help from my friends, COWGIRL UP |
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marw
Quit Date: -
Posts: 3634 Location: Chicago, IL
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Posted: June 30, 2006 11:40 PM Post subject: |
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Kay, I am keeping up with you as things happen. I am so glad Londa could be of help here. This has got to be a horrible, horible time for you, and frustration that others cannot even imagine. Just wanted you to know I am thinking fo you, and you have my prayers!! .....and keep trying to take some time for yourself!
Hugs!! _________________
Margaret |
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Cowgirl UP!
Quit Date: July 26, 2004
Posts: 5029 Location: Ala
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Posted: July 6, 2006 5:03 PM Post subject: |
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The account is finally closed! I am exhausted after arguing with these nuts for 14 straight days as to what is meant by a by account and the right to close down a checking account that I was the only signer on....Geez, and they handle people's money????? Oh, the last thing they tried to tell me was that it was a beneficary account and that is how they could close the money market account without my signature.....excuse me, but do you really believe my ghost is writing this email????? Don't fret, all my accounts are being closed and transferred....37 years and they get a brain freeze on me.....I have known better horses! Next week, I tackle the trust accounts....yes, I am getting out of all of it....it is time my older sisters start taking responsibility for themselves...I know it will be a shock for them to have to be responsible for the first time at their ages but, I cannot continue to live this way...it is way to stressful....if I want to live, then I must learn to take time for me.... the time has come... and nope I have not smoked although I bet the bank wished I would
Kay _________________
All with a little help from my friends, COWGIRL UP |
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kevin Site Admin
Quit Date: -
Posts: 9538 Location: cincinnati, oh
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Posted: July 6, 2006 6:29 PM Post subject: |
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hang in there, kay - you're doing the right thing. for all concerned. _________________
keep choosing life!
kevin
the zen of the quit |
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marw
Quit Date: -
Posts: 3634 Location: Chicago, IL
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Posted: July 7, 2006 12:25 AM Post subject: |
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Kay, Kevin is right! You are certainly doing the right thing! And more power to you for having the guts to do this! I would be furious with that bank also. (btw: It is even making me a tad worried, because I do believe we have the same type of account for my Mother.....my brother and I, I mean. She is in a nursing home, and we write checks.....my brother only, since he is there and I am not.....but technically I could, and I have when I have been down there and needed to buy clothes for her. So I FAIL UTTERLY to see how that account could have closed???? My brother and I are fairly close, so problems should not arise, but it is scary to think we cannot close the account if we wanted?? Yikes! Or someone else could use it? THis cannot be right!) I think what we have is a money market account for her.....I do not know about beneficiary accounts?
Anyway, I am so glad you are getting out from under all of this. And I think it is better for your sisters also. Keep hanging in there!
Love and hugs to you! _________________
Margaret |
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Cowgirl UP!
Quit Date: July 26, 2004
Posts: 5029 Location: Ala
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Posted: July 7, 2006 10:44 AM Post subject: |
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I am hanging Kevin, I promise
Margaret, it was a money market account that had my sister's name by me......I listed her as beneficiary incase I was killed in a car wreck or died suddenly so she could get to her savings....The bank screwed up and these are just excuses....they did not ask for custodial papers nor did they have a copy of my power of attorney until I took them one....they are covering their asses...sorry but they are...for anyone who wishes to know the name of this bank send a pm....I do not know if they are in your state or not......
I meet with an attorney Monday...sure hope he studied more than the last one I talked to....when I wake up after two hours sleep and I can see where he has left me wide open for a law suit..and where I can see he misread the will, ...I tend to get concerned as I am not the sharpest tool in the shed!
Kay _________________
All with a little help from my friends, COWGIRL UP |
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Pamela
Quit Date: -
Posts: 3542 Location: Gardiner, NY
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Posted: July 7, 2006 11:34 AM Post subject: |
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It's amazing what us "normal" peoPle have to deal with, isn't it Kay.
Here's a good one for you. My dad died about 20 years ago, and my mom about 9 year ago. After mom passed, I had to sell her house in Troy. The title company asked me and the estate lawyer to show proof that my mom and dad WEREN'T divorced when he died. (I guess the title was never changed to just my mom's name).
Now, we scratched our heads. How do you prove someone ISN't divorced? Well, other than the fact that I told them my mother never would have continued to put up with dad if they weren't still married, I found the letter from social security giving my mother WIDOWS benefits.
I guess if the federal government believes you're married, it's good enough for the title company.
The moral of this story is....NEVER throw anything out, especially if it's from the federal government!
I know what you mean though Kay...it's enough to make you want to drink a whole bottle of whine! _________________
FIVE + years of freedom and loving it! |
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Cowgirl UP!
Quit Date: July 26, 2004
Posts: 5029 Location: Ala
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Posted: July 7, 2006 9:42 PM Post subject: |
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Yes, Pamela I do feel like a bottle of wine and some cheese to go along with the whine ..
I went to the bank today to stop the automatic drafts and to close my personal money market account...the young girl was searching through all our accounts when she asked" Are you going to pull everything out of this bank and move your accounts?" Ug, Yes I said...." May I ask why?" so, I told her She made a statement that it may not be over yet and told me how sorry she was that this whole mess had occured....she was there the day I opened these accounts.....think I may have found my ace in the hole.....a young lady with a conscious9???? well you know what I mean...
Kay _________________
All with a little help from my friends, COWGIRL UP |
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marw
Quit Date: -
Posts: 3634 Location: Chicago, IL
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Posted: July 8, 2006 12:15 AM Post subject: |
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Kay, I am sorry you are e going through this! Gosh, what a mess, and an anxiety producing thing! I think I will just send you that PM if you don't mind, because I definitely would like to know that bank. I will explailn our set-up to you, too, very similar it sounds like to yours.
I will call my brother and make sure we are on the right path with this! _________________
Margaret |
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Simone
Quit Date: April 28, 2005
Posts: 953 Location: Australia
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Posted: July 12, 2006 12:02 PM Post subject: |
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(((HUGS))) Kay , wish I could help you with a real hug .So much to cope with so I'm sending Guardian Angels to help you out
Simone XX |
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Free
Quit Date: May 12, 2006
Posts: 826 Location: USA
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Posted: July 26, 2006 3:29 PM Post subject: |
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Hi Cowgirl. How are things going? Hope they are going better. _________________
Become addicted to constant and never ending self improvement.
The difference between a mountain and a molehill is your perspective.
Realize that true happiness lies within you. |
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