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my advice to you, the new quitter:

 
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kevin
Site Admin


Quit Date:
-

Posts: 9538
Location: cincinnati, oh

PostPosted: December 31, 2007 9:55 PM    Post subject: my advice to you, the new quitter: Reply with quote

live your life in "day-tight" compartments.

in other words, treat every day as its own separate thing:

don't waste time and energy regretting what you did (or didn't do) yesterday (or the day before that, or the day before that...); the past is over, it's carved in stone, you can't take it back, and you can't change it.

get over it.

and don't waste time and energy worrying about what might happen tomorrow (or the day after tomorrow, or the day after that...); you can't do anything about tomorrow until it becomes today.

a lot of stress comes from trying to live in some other time than right now; it can't be done, and yet, we try: we think, "if only i'd quit sooner..." or we think, "maybe i should wait until tomorrow to quit..." but the thing is, the only time we can quit is today.

in fact, the only time we can quit is right now. while we're having that monster crave...

here's a little thought experiment for you:

imagine you're a smoker and you've just boarded a plane for a transcontinental flight. you're stuck on the plane for 8 hours, and there's no smoking.

you settle into your seat, half an hour goes by...

and you get a crave.

but you can't feed it!

what do you do?

you pick up a magazine, take out the book you brought along, turn on the in-flight movie - something to get your mind off the crave.

eventually, the crave goes away. even though you didn't feed it.

where did it go?

who cares? the point is, it went away, all by itself, even though you didn't feed it. and every crave you have while you're on that plane will do the same thing.

here's another little thought experiment for you:

imagine you're a smoker and you've just checked in to the hospital for some elective surgery. you're going to be stuck here for a few days, and there's no smoking.

you settle into your bed, a half hour goes by...

and wham! you get a crave.

but you can't feed it!

what do you do?

you pick up a magazine, you take out the book you brought along, you turn on the tv - anything to get your mind off the crave...

eventually, the crave goes away. even though you didn't feed it.

where did it go?

who cares? once again, the point is, it went away, all by itself, even though you didn't feed it. and every single crave you have while you're in the hospital will do exactly the same thing.

now for the $64,000 question: do the craves get stronger or weaker the longer you're in the hospital?

if you've ever been in this situation as a smoker, you know the answer: they get weaker.

because you can't feed them.

so why do you think the craves are going to act any differently now that you've chosen not to feed them than they did when the airline or the hospital told you you weren't allowed to feed them?

they're not.

they're going to go away, all by themselves, without you feeding them, and the longer you go without feeding them, the weaker they'll get, until you barely notice them any more.

how do i know?

because i started choosing not to feed them any more on november 19th of 2001, and i can't honestly remember the last time i had a crave; it's been years. and before you say, "well, that's easy for you to say; you've been quit for over 6 years!", remember this:

i started out on day one, just like everybody who quits. i decided that i was not going to smoke, just for that day, that hour, that minute... that i was not going to smoke right now. then, on day two, i made the same choices again. on day three, same thing.

if you look back over my journey so far, you'll see that i've been quit for a little over six years. but if you look a little closer, you'll see that what actually happened was that i chose life - i chose not to smoke - just for today, 2,233 times.

break it down to its most basic, and what i did was simple: i chose not to smoke, just for today. and you can do the same.

choose life, just for today, and tomorrow will take care of itself.

promise.
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keep choosing life!

kevin

the zen of the quit
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Rusty



Quit Date:
December 13, 2004

Posts: 497
Location: North Florida

PostPosted: December 31, 2007 10:12 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

Beautiful, Kevin!

Rusty
_________________

The Buddha says: Let us rise up and be thankful, for if we didn't learn a lot today, at least we learned a little, and if we didn't learn a little, at least we didn't get sick, and if we got sick, at least we didn't die; so, let us all be thankful.
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Seabrez



Quit Date:
-

Posts: 4458
Location: Gulf Coast

PostPosted: December 31, 2007 10:18 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thank you, Kevin!!!

It is so simple...and yet, we, as humans love to complicate things. Rolling Eyes Wink Yes, no looking back and regretting the "what ifs" and "could of, should of's"...but focus on today! Amen, amen to that!

It truly, truly is just making the decision in the moment and living through it. And I'm, for one, am glad to finally have realized that with this quit. It's so freeing. Very Happy

You know just how to simplify things and cut to the chase, as they say! Wink Very Happy

New quitters....there's no better advise that this!! Kudos, Kevin!

Hugs
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Living in Freedom
Deb

Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come. 2 Corn 5:17 NASB
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kevin
Site Admin


Quit Date:
-

Posts: 9538
Location: cincinnati, oh

PostPosted: December 31, 2007 11:44 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

thanks, rusty and deb! Smile
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keep choosing life!

kevin

the zen of the quit
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Mary Dude



Quit Date:
June 15, 2004

Posts: 4803
Location: Pittsburgh, PA

PostPosted: January 1, 2008 2:32 AM    Post subject: Reply with quote

agree, choose freedom right now and when you need to - choose it again - ten minutes from right now - or ten hours from right now - or ten days from right now - whenever you find yourself entertaining the thought of returning to the chains of addiction - remember that you broke free - and to stay free all you have to do is choose freedom again - just for right now.

I keep choosing to be free...
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Mary D.
Smoke-free one day at a time!
Worry doesn't help tomorrow's troubles, but it does ruin today's happiness!
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Pamela



Quit Date:
-

Posts: 3542
Location: Gardiner, NY

PostPosted: January 1, 2008 12:14 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

Well said, and so simple!

Today, I'm chosing to not smoke, and to not drink.

I know i can do it....how about you?
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FIVE + years of freedom and loving it!
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kannprint



Quit Date:
April 10, 2004

Posts: 4988
Location: St. Louis, MO

PostPosted: January 1, 2008 2:12 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

Great post, Kevin. As we've all learned; one week/one day/one hour/one minute at a time. It works.
_________________

LIVE WELL, LAUGH OFTEN, LOVE MUCH.
Jo
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essie662



Quit Date:
April 14, 2004

Posts: 3388
Location: MI

PostPosted: January 1, 2008 2:22 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

Smile
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Essie
4/14/04
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Cowgirl UP!



Quit Date:
July 26, 2004

Posts: 5029
Location: Ala

PostPosted: January 1, 2008 3:49 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

I sure hope they listen to you...it took me forever to relax enough to trust the wisdom I was getting from this site...please people don't fight it just go with it...it works.
Kay
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All with a little help from my friends, COWGIRL UP
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pinkpearl



Quit Date:
June 30, 2007

Posts: 1667
Location: Illinois

PostPosted: January 1, 2008 7:02 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

thanks kevin, I enjoyed reading that.
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daggy12



Quit Date:
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Posts: 678
Location: Palm Bay, FL

PostPosted: January 13, 2008 9:32 AM    Post subject: Reply with quote

Wow Kevin that was great.
Its like everyday I wake up and start new. Refreshed Hope, faith and trust. Thanks for the post!
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Life can only be "understood" by looking backward, but must be "lived" by looking forward.

Patty
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Barbara K.



Quit Date:
December 23, 2004

Posts: 5977

PostPosted: February 1, 2008 4:10 AM    Post subject: Reply with quote

Very Happy Great post Kevin! You have had some mighty tall challenges in your quit but like you said, you choose not to smoke.
_________________

Obstacles don't have to stop you. If you run into a wall, don't turn arouind and give up. Figure out how to climb it, go through it, or work around it.

Blessings,
Barbara K.
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Nosmoex



Quit Date:
July 4, 2007

Posts: 198

PostPosted: February 12, 2008 7:51 PM    Post subject: Reply with quote

Dang! How did I not see this? That post is the TRUTH!!!! Shocked Shocked
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